Day 164

the days all run together. he seems like a dream who was never real. except i miss him with every bone in my body. every day. all the time. i know he's not coming back, but i want him to. i make imaginary lists of all the the things i would give up, to have him back, if just for 5 minutes. i would make that 5 minutes count. i would talk so fast that i would get out a lifetimes worth of loving thoughts and questions before those few minutes were up. i would smell him, i would kiss him, i would run my hands through his beard. i would memorize every square inch of him. i would develop superhuman powers to do it all.