The incredibly true adventures of a travel loving kid at heart who just became both an MBA and a recent widow. Navigating widowhood is the hardest thing I've ever done. Come along for the bumps in the journey.
6.19.2006
update
thr doctors in germany have changed their story. my grandma is not going to pass away at any time, like they originally told us (although i guess that was obvious by the amount of time that has already passed since she entered the hospital... they told us today that she's in a persistant vegetative state... and since this could go on for ten years (or more) the hospitsal is saying that she needs to be moved to a different care facility... so the relatives in germany are looking into a place where she'll be cared for and monitored 24 hours a day... i hate this. i hate the idea that my grandmother is just lying in a bed unable to move or communicate, just waiting to die. i hate that no one can tell me anything except what they think she experiences in this condition... i hate this so much... my grandma was so elegant... she never went out without her hair done, without being well dressed... and i can't get the idea out of my head that they'll cut her hair because it will be easier to take care of... my grandma never had short hair... she wasn't one of those old woman who cuts their hair short as they get older because it's easier... she has long silver hair which she flawlessly styles into a bun every day... this fate feels worse than death... if she had to go, why couldn't it be quick? i don't know how to cope with this...
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3 comments:
I know what you're going through, Raphie. I feel the same way about my grandma. She would always have make-up on and her hair done and wear little pins. Even on the way to the hospital last week, she was so weak and in pain, she still managed to put lipstick on and her pin of a dove. Now, the place she is at just leaves her in a hospital gown all day and "forgets" to bathe her. She will be tranferred out of the hell she is enduring in a few days, but until then my heart aches when my mom tells me the things my grandmother says they do to her at this place. I am right there with you about wishing they could just go peacefully and not have to go through all the bullshit. Thankfully, we have each other to lean on, Raphie.
There's no guarantee on an easy exit. That's why religions were invented.
Best wishes to you and your family.
It's sooo much more difficult when you can't be at your grandma's side. Again I am sorry for your pain, please take care.
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